Monday, December 21, 2009

Chennai charm

Chennai is cool. Some drizzle. Some areas are as dirty as ever but Chennai shines. Went to Spenser's shopping plaza but ended up just window shopping. Good to be back with family and missing you guys and gals, my precious friends. Will sure catch up. Excuse my tardiness in writing posts and comments as of now.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Cycling around Dubai

Beautiful Friday. Wonderful Friday. Why am I jumping with joy? Hey..buddies, at last I got to pedal 11 kms on a bicycle in the heart of Jumairah, Dubai. Don’t believe? OK, am posting my photo so you are doubly sure.
It has been years since I went cycling. When I used my bicycle in Mumbai, the neighbourhood would comment, “See that stingy guy. Cannot afford a scooter.” Many guys asked, “You are working in a good company. Why don’t you buy a car?” Anyway, society is meant to place hurdles and we are supposed to find our way to happiness. My dad was riding a bicycle even when he was 75.
A fitness company had organized the cycle-o-thon. Our sports editor Agnelo proved to be stronger than me. He finished the 11 kms coolly, while I struggled at the last lap a bit. Now, don’t laugh, you enemy.
OK, now I am busy packing for India trip. You people dint say what you wanted from here, so I dint buy anything for you. But my bag is full of love for you, my precious friends. Cya.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Wife-bashers, you cowards

I reached the first floor and rang the bell. The door had a little window through which we can see inside. The sound of the bell and the sound of a person falling down coincided. I saw my friend’s wife falling with a huge thud. She was in tears. She looked at me for a second and there was pin-drop silence. Embarrassment. Total embarrassment. After two minutes, my friend came and opened the door. I could surmise the situation. There had been a little war there. The woman had been pushed down. OMG. I could not sit there. I moved out ASAP. The funny thing is I saw the couple happily huddled together in a week. What a comical world!
I had been to another acquaintance’s house. The wife was being rushed to the doctor after a punch from her husband left her bleeding on the nose. Next day, she was massaging the hubby’s head as he had headache.
A good female friend of mine of Middle East origin had to take divorcé just to escape a violent hubby.
Shame on such husbands.
Only in my dreams I can try such a thing. So it went one day I gave a solid punch to my wife when she irritated me beyond boiling point. All she did was twist my left hand behind, warning, “Next time you try this, your won’t have your one hand to use for the computer.” Baapre, Tauba, tauba..what a dream!
Already, media reports claim that golfer Tiger Woods lost his tooth after his angry wife threw the mobile on him.

India visit

BTW, blog buddies in India. It will be great if any of you are interested in meeting over a cup of tea (hey u pay, kanjoos). Will be visiting Chennai, Bangalore and Mumbai between Dec20 to Jan 9. Marina in Chennai, Forum Mall in Bangalore and Vashi, Kandivli (Mumbai) are sure spots for me. Do stay connected on if ya feel v can get in touch. Cheers.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Missed you on cruise

Another Saturday weekend. This time it was a different experience. So happy to share with you, my precious friends. Actually, I was invited along with a couple of other media friends to visit Costa Luminosa, one of the most elegant Italian cruise ships that arrived in Dubai.
It’s the first time for Costa Luminosa (2,826 guests) to operate in Dubai.
Lemme tell the highlights to save your time: The ship has 20 different types of marble, timbers, mother of pearl granite, 120 Murano glass chandeliers. There was an excellent work of art sculpture by Fernando Botero “Donna Sdraiata 2004 (Reclining Woman 2004) on Costa Luminosa. Only twice or thrice I had been on such ships; so I was amazed by the facilities inside. 200 original paintings, 4D cinema, roller skating track, golf stimulator, grand prix driving simulator, spa, gym, swimming pool…well..
I know, I know. How did I manage my veg lunch? It took two minutes for me to make friends with the smiling European chef.
All the photos were captured on my mobile, except for the first one of the actual ship. Naturally, the photos are bad and I was tempted to dump my mobile into the Arabian sea. But who will buy for me a new one? Any one out there?
C ya.

Reclining woman sculpture

Here's the Hollywood star you wanted to meet.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

The chaotic charm

I was chatting with Patrick, the CEO of a company that maintains the AC bus shelters on Dubai roads.
“Are things really green in Dubai?” I asked him.
I liked the guy because he’s a diehard optimist.
“If you think things are bad, why add to negativity. Let’s embrace chaos and optimism,” he smiled.
I spent most time in a city that cuddled chaotic charm –Mumbai. So I had to readily agree.
Dubai is in news internationally for negative reasons. But the truth is that it is an amazing city, which helped people make gold from sand. These are tough times, but as Lincoln said, only the test of fire makes fine steel.
OK, OK. Let’s not get serious. Back to Ansar Salim’s new joke:
A farmer was working in a remote area when he saw a bus falling into a ditch. He reached the spot, pushed all the mud around and buried the occupants along with the bus.
After a few hours, a rescue crew arrived.
“Did you see any bus?”
“Any survivors?”
“A couple of them screaming “help, help.” But I noticed that they were politicians and thought as usual they are lying.”

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Oh husbands!

Poor husbands, some of them are so henpecked.
I remember the German hubby of an Indian wife who was so henpecked that he waited for his spouse’s command every moment.
“Why you are standing? I told you to go and get it,” she screamed at him once and before I could turn to look at his reaction he had disappeared. The poor guy must be deeply in love.
Another old man I knew will tell his wife everytime the woman opens her mouth, “Baby, I am here na. Lemme explain. Baby, just wait baby.” What bloody baby! Many a times I had escaped before this guy put his “baby” to sleep with his lullaby.
This Chennai hubby used to wash his wife’s clothes and cook as well. And yet she will find fault with him. There was water shortage in the area and the hubby will wait in queue for hours to fetch water from a roadside tanker. “He managed only four buckets today,” she complained one day and the rubberstamp-husband nodded his head “Hehe, they did not allow me to take more.”
Henpecked husbands; Enjoy if you are enjoying. No objection. But I am not in your list. Wait. Lemme ask my wife. Baby, what do ya say baby?

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Sun rises, sets, rises again

Saturday comes, Saturday goes. Weekly off is gone. But should say enjoyed it. First it was breakfast with a great friend, a “Bengal tigress.” The loving family of Suresh hosted a delicious lunch and Sri Lankan friend Ahamat offered Subway sandwich for dinner. What better way to spend the off!
Talking of weekly offs, time flies so fast we wonder where we are heading. We toil six days to enjoy that one day off.
I picked this brilliant quote from
The preacher, son of David, king in Jerusalem, says: “What does man gain from all his labour in which he labours under the sun? One generation goes; another generation comes, but the earth remains forever. The sun rises, goes does down, and hurries to its place where it rises.”
The moment we are born, the risk of dying is also born. If risk takes birth as a birthright, why should we spend time worrying about the risks involved in life. It’s all part of the package. Let’s play with risk then, though using caution, bestowed upon us in the form of wisdom. Shucks, serious stuff.
Let’s move on to Pakistani colleague Ansar Salim’s joke.
A truck driver was passing a busy road when the signal turned red. All other drivers applied the brakes, but this driver moved on. How? Hehe, he was walking.
Hey, don’t beat me ya. This is Ansar’s joke.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Eureka, new way to fool

Newton was relaxing under a tree when an apple fell and he discovered the law of gravitation. “Eureka” Archimedes was blissfully taking a bath when he realised the buoyancy principle.
My friend was continuing his lecture, when I interrupted: “Why this sermon?”
“Well, whatever you do, just relax and enjoy.”
By then, we had reached the canteen. He ordered sandwich and mint coffee.
“I am telling you all this so that you learn to take things easy,” he continued.
“I am ok. I do not get worked up over silly things,” I boasted.
He gave more instances of how to handle stressful situations.
“Are you sure you are a cool cat?” he asked.
I smelt a rat but like a fool blurted, “I presume so.”
“Well then, quickly pay the bill.”

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

The rat n snake story

Six of us colleagues were in the midst of a hot tea session when Muntazir Imam posed an intriguing question citing from a book he is writing.
A snake charmer enters a forest, struggles for hours and manages to trap a deadly cobra. He shunts the snake inside a basket along with a rat he had brought. He returns home away from the forest and opens the basket. Lo and behold! The snake lies dead, while the rat jumps out and escapes merrily.
“Now you guys answer how it could have happened,” Muntazir put it on the mat.
There were diverse reactions. One said the snake must have been sick and almost dead before capture, while another guessed that the rat winked at the snake with an “I care too hoots for you” look and the snake committed suicide. MJP of the Philippines argued, “Never take small things for granted. The tiny rat had a larger brain and bit the huge snake where it kills.”
Now over to you, guys and gals out there.